Upon further inspection
Letting go of urgency to find what’s truly there.
Originally published on Substack March of ‘25
Fly by Katie Crawford
The weight of my camera taxes my arms, my eye squinting until, focus, the moment. I’m pained to realize the color variations and nuance I’ve missed in my hurried existence.
Stillness demands a deeper inquiry, a moment to witness, to allow the edges to take shape. If we relax our gaze and allow time to adjust, the edges come within reach and we can grab hold. A new perspective is gained. A new world of color and light emerges. Suddenly, the world is no longer made up of “us” but an ever expanding universe that exists outside of our awareness (no camera required).
Last of the season Zinnia and Skipper visitor by Katie Crawford
Much of what we do is in avoidance of pain, real or imagined, for ourself or others, shying away from emotion, shying away from reaction. We attempt to disguise the complexities within ourselves. We present a tough front when we need a moment to melt. We drive forward towards goals we’re not even sure we want. In our haste, we miss an opportunity to appreciate.
As we hurry, we deny ourselves the buffet of experience. I find myself asking: What are we rushing towards? What do we hope to discover?
Blue eyed dragonfly by Katie Crawford
We worry about our unique expression, fret about the inevitable derivatives in our work. We worry about old hurts and embarrassments lost to time.
We are steeped in all who have come before us. On our meandering path, we carry little bits of light and dark from anyone we’ve ever shared time. For my experience, I’m grateful, as it’s opened my eyes to a gentle world accepting of variation and complexity larger than my most troublesome thoughts.
True Insect by Katie Crawford
To let go of our compulsive rush and worry is to release our need for control. The initial discomfort is worth the delight gained. To slow and breathe and offer compassion for our neighbors, ourselves. In time spent in the present, we can tend the childlike wonder within us and set it free to run wild with our collective imagination.
I intend to spend my life working to cultivate the type of awe that can only be encountered in the moment. Where you grasp at a thread of some universal truth and feel it slip past your comprehension. The way an infinitely complex creature may rest on your palm, and in a moment, is gone.
Smiling Skipper by Katie Crawford
